RSS Feed (xml)

Powered By

Skin Design:
Free Blogger Skins

Powered by Blogger

Friday, 26 September 2014

Flashing Lights

Sometimes I'm the most popular girl in the world. Everyone wants a piece of me. My phone rings till my battery dies and my message apps run my phone to heat.

Other days, my phone doesn't ring at all and i have to say something to actually hear a voice. Those are the days I hate, when i feel like no one cares.

I've been saying it, that it's been a hectic past year and every time i see some form of light to get me out of my bullshit of a life, something or someone drags me back in.

I honestly don't know why I'm afraid of being alone; its inevitable. I should own it, live it and embrace the lifestyle, make my money and go back to being an angry bitch.

Its  days like this when i feel needy, wanting someone, anyone to care, to just say hi, to just be there.

I honestly need new friends or I just need a new hobby.

Everyone else seems so busy while i seem to have all the time in the world. Yet, no one wants to hang out or go work out or even have a movie date.

I've never been one to push up myself on others, so why am i doing it now?

Something has got to change, I may need to get out of this city, its poisonous.

Saturday, 30 August 2014

Chris Brown - New Flame

This is currently my ring tone...

Anytime i hear, i feel like breaking into a moon walk.

Luv the beat.

Rules of Engagement

I'm not so sure about this dating thing. Guys don't seem to understand what I'm about and I just don't get them. It's either that I've been out of the game for so long that I've forgotten how to actually play it or that I'm too grown for foolishness. Maybe the latter.

I think it's important when establishing any sort of relationship with someone for the rules to be clearly defined; a common ground. You know, so there's no confusion as to what 'we' really are. Spending countless hours chatting via Skype or whatsapp or even on the phone does not mean that it is confirmation that we are a 'thing'. In addition, to the farthest extreme as I have learnt these past months that having sex with someone also does not mean that its automatic that you are a couple.

We are all adults here and It's best to communicate what you want to see if the other person is on the same page as you are and be truthful about this. If you want something casual, then speak your mind, as too if you want something on a deeper, more serious level, say what you want and mean what you say. Deception seems to be the 'A' in the game but I digress.

There was an occasion where I have asked a guy whether he wants something casual or a serious relationship. He was just coming out of a 5 year relationship and I was just getting over a summer romance. At the time I was in a frame of mind for either but he insisted that he wanted something serious. Five months into it, he decided he wanted to date other people. Ok, fair enough. I think he thought that if he said casual then I wouldn't have been up to it and he wouldn't have gotten a chance to bed me, but truth is, some people are just not husband material and will serve as distractions for the time being.

I'm never one to hold a person back when they want to go, as a matter I'll open the door for you. What I couldn't understand though is that even after he said that he wanted to see other people, why was it an issue with me going out with another guy suddenly a bitch move on my part? Like what the fuck bruh? Last time I checked, you said you wanted to date other people. Does that not go for me too? I thought slavery was done with but apparently It's Ok for him to move on, but not me. 

'The double standard shit is total fuckery. A man can go out with as many women as he wishes but as soon as a female does the same thing, she's a ho.' Who made that stupid rule?


What's the worst that could happen if you label what it is from the get go? I find that it's mostly men who wish not to label a relationship. Personally I think that:

1. They don't want to be tied down
2. They are waiting to see if someone better comes along
3. Do not want the responsibility that comes with labeling.

Whether it be 'girlfriend/boyfriend', 'friends with benefits' or even 'dating to see if we can have a relationship'. Labels are not scarce resources and as an adult, if the relationship you agreed to is not going in your favour, then you can always rescind that agreement. No biggie. 

But from my experience, it's always best to define what type of relationship you're in because it saves time, understanding and heartache.