Don't get it twisted. While everyone including me, at the end of the day, just wants someone to love and share their lives with that doesn't mean I'm going to loose my self respect in the process.
I've often not considered myself as a fighter or a very persistent person due to the fact that I will usually stick to something even though the benefits derived may not be immediately forthcoming. I like to see the good in someone and I like to invest in hopes of getting mutual returns. But, if in the process I observe that my kindness is not appreciated and being taken advantage of, then that's where I usually throw in the towel.
It sucks because I really wanted to have a relationship with this guy but my attempts of getting mutual respect and benefit was overshadowed by his selfishness. He wanted me to give up so much and not get back equal in return almost as if I was disparate and had a tree growing in my face. No bitch!
I was/am in love with him yes, but I will also not belittle myself and settle for the half assed percentage I was being offered just for the sake of having someone in my life. No I won't put myself at risks for diseases and more heart ache just because I wanted to be with him.
Instead I will take my pride and self respect and walk away and wait for the one whom I deserve and who deserves me.
No doubt, if you want a relationship to work you have to be selfless and not be expecting gains from what you put in. I know I'm all teary eyed now and caught up with possibly loosing a guy who I know I could make a great life with but being a concubine for a selfish man is not in my resume for love. I'll wait. I hope my decisions now will be beneficial in my future.
So it turns out that I am a fighter and I am persistent afterall but my fight has to match equally with what im actually fighting for and it has to be worth my time.